I am fresh off a 3 year opiate ride and to be quite honest I am the most weak and tired than I have ever been. The anxiety is killing me. All I want is a couple roxy and some morphine 60's. Before today I was up to about 12 roxy 30's and 10 morph 60's. I am quitting cold turkey and also quiting for the first time. I've heard this will absolutely not work and I will be a junkie again within a day. My friend gave me a handful of xanax, Nuvigil, and Naproxin. If any of you have experiences similar to mine please let me know if I can beat this with what I've been given for help being: Xan, Nuvigil, and Naproxin? I really dont want this life anymore. Everything I get asked to do like go to the movies, go out of state, or just hang for a couple hours all depends on whether or not I have enough pills! It sucks. I'd rather worry about having enough gas instead of how many pills it'll take for me to tolerate my friends, whom I love dearly). Tolerate: meaning fighting the depression of not having drugs and and the almost death that happens to me with every fake hate filled smile I have to give. uhhhggh I just want it to be over. SO I GUESS my question is will the Nuvigil give me the energy and attitude I need for the three days of horrible sickness I am about to go through? I have been off opiates now for 12 hours and I am already terrified. What a great drug for pain but the abuse of it is just a inexcusable insecurity that I would like to abolish asap. I know this isnt the right Blog to write to but all the other blogs just talk about different ways to feel high. I dont need that. Please help if you can, if not I completely understand. Thanks for listening. Good luck to all :)
I honestly wish I could say whether or not any of those drugs would benefit you, but medications can and usually do affect everyone differently, whereas some people get great results, but there are others that it inevitably just doesn't work for no matter how many they take. Unfortunately when it comes to prescription drugs the only to find out is to try it for yourself and decide after a few days to a week or so if they are really right for you.
Armodafinil (Nuvigil) is a stimulant-like drug that seems to have a number of different uses from sleep disorders, to depression, jet lag, and schizophrenia. Personally, I would just stick to some strong caffeinated tea, so as to at least reap any additional health benefits in the process. But yes, Nuvigil may help you with energy.
And although I don't have any personal experience with this type of situation, I think it would be helpful to make some sort of chart on a calendar showing how much of each of those medications you're taking and at what times you plan on taking them. A strict schedule like this should help you make the most of what pills you do have.
If anyone else has some helpful information to share that would be great too!
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know a woman w/fibromialga & because of some legal issues they cut her off her opiate medications & she took some of a friend's nuvigil & she said she gets a huge energy difference. Ive Bern prescribed opiates bover 10years & I know long term use they give u energy as oposed to draining energy. Best of luck to u. I never take more than I'm supposed to so I don't have a withdrawal when I don't take them, just more pain in the areas I take them for.
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I have been taking nuvigill 250 mg. one only every morning for 3 months and most of the day I am almost euphoric and get a lot of work done. However I can not sleep until 4 a.m. so I take klonipin 0.5 mg and sleep only 4 hours. With insurance 30 pills cost me $ 90.00..I have tried twice to not take a nuvigill and could not function. So I took one the next day and tried to skip and then every time I skip for one day I fall into a deep hole and get dehydrated very easy and no appetite. I am frightened that I see no way out. When I try to skip a day by noon I have to take one.. I miss the sense of well being it gives me. The delema scares me.Any thoughts?
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It is really amazing to me how little the general population knows about addiction!! Nuvigil and Xanax are both very addictive drugs, for those who are allready suffering from addiction--it's like trading seats on the Titanic! Whoever is telling you it absolutely won't work is absolutely right! I am speaking not only from my own experience, but from the many people I've come in contact with during my struggles with addiction. Anything you use that rapidly causes euphoria (or intense excitement or serenity) is an addictive substance--including alcohol of course. Naproxyn is just an anti-inflammatory, like Motrin, so it's OK to take that for that awful joint pain opiate withdrawel causes. Most antidepressant's are also considered OK, because there is a subtle improvement in mood over time. The vast majority of addicts will tell you the only way to stop that runaway train is to STOP! This means ALL mood altering drugs. But it doesn't mean you have to suffer. The best way, for most, is tapering doses of either methadone or suboxone, in a CONTROLLED environment. For me, I had to do this inpatient, at a rehab, with a nurse bringing me the meds--tried to do it on the outside ( Dr.'s prescription or methadone clinic ), unsuccessfully quite a few times. There are those who have been able to stop opiate abuse by diligently following a Dr.'s or Methadone/Suboxone Clinic's recomendations which always incude some kind of self-help--AA, NA, out- patient treatment,and/or counselling etc. I really wish the best for you--I felt your despair coming right through, the same despair I have felt. It is hard to stop at first, and there are good days and bad, but it can and has been done and once you realize you are on your way down that road of light and life (instead of pain, darkness, and ultimately an untimely death), the feeling is indescribable.
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I have been in the same boat your in due to a motorcycle accident taking every kind of legal opiate out there for 5 years. They do take care of the pain but they also turn you into a legal junkie. Forget about the Nuvigil and the Xanax is as hard to detox from as the pain meds. Methadone is a full opiate and you will become addicted to them if you take them to come off the Oxys, Morphine etc. You need to start a Suboxone program. This will get you off them fast without feeling sick. I started with the 8/2mg film twice a day. After 5 days I cut the dose in half per day. Now I'm off. One thing you should know. If you try this, before you take your 1st film you need to have NO opiates in your system for a minimum of 24 hours or more. It worked like magic for me. Good luck.
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JOEY DOGGS Says:
Listen, I am telling you this from experience...If your habit is what you say it is then you will have a really hard time kicking cold turkey!!!! You need to go to a 7 day detox and clean all that s*** out of you...For you to be worrying about Nuvigil is just crazy....I really hope you get the help that you need...AGAIN I am telling you this because I have been there and kicking is NOT fun at all....If you need that stuff to cope with your friends then you need to seek some help and get busy living...See my problem has always been that I compare my insides with everyone's outside and I could never understand why I always felt that way...Once I got the correct help I started to enjoy my life...OH YEAH, I have had an opiate addiction for 20 years and if I could do it then you can too!!!!! GOOD LUCK BUDDY
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SallyB- I've been addicted to opiates for about 6 years now, off and on. I used suboxone for about a year to get clean a couple years ago.. Was clean for about 5 months and then relapsed about 8 months ago. I am seeing a doctor now and ready to try and get clean again doing the suboxone program. Only thing that scares the hell out of me is the suboxone withdrawal. Last time I got off suboxone I went thru about 20 days of hell. Do you think this is because I did not wean properly? What was your experience like coming off suboxone? Did you have withdrawal, how long did it last, how intense, what was your dosage at the end? Etc. hopefully you see this message, I know this thread was like a year ago. Thanks for any info.
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Dorman Bedford Forrest C Says:
My friend, congratulations on taking a BIG step!! Your life will improve, but it'll take some time to get over the physical symptoms of withdrawal and the psychological effects even more time. Believe me; I was a stone-cold- any- opiate-will-be-fine kind of guy, but my preference was(and is, if truth be told) H and oxycontin. I tried cold turkey; you name it. I was on this s*** for more than 20 years, yep, 20! I finally had enough and went the Suboxone route. It's damned expensive but insurance(I hope you have it) will take care of most the cost. I have been opiate-free for 4 years and life has never been better. Lots of people said "Oh man, that stuff's addictive too!" Yeah it is. But there're two good aspects: 1) It's legal, and 2) it chases the withdrawal the hell AWAY! You need to find a doctor who is licensed to prescribe it and you've gotta be serious about getting away from the s***. I hate the term 'clean' because, hell, I already take regular baths; at least once every two weeks whether I need it or not.
There are many schools of thought on Suboxone. Some say you are just substituting one addiction for another. Believe me, addiction to Suboxone is legal, it doesn't get you high but it will damn sure make you feel better about yourself and everybody around you. You'll get something you probably don't have a lot of right now- self respect. True, it is technically trading one addiction for another but the folks that harp on that have never been in the throes of withdrawal that makes you think that death wouldn't be so bad as an alternative. The doc will start you off on a dose sufficient to get rid of the withdrawal. The effect is that when you put that little nasty-tasting(some people even like it) film under your tongue, after 20 or 30 minutes if the doc has given you the appropriate dose, those goddamned terrible monkeys will be LONG GONE!!
I realize that I can only give you my experience but you don't have anything to lose but those morphine blues( whatever you wanna call 'em). If your doc knows his or her business it will be up to you how much time you want to take to wean off Suboxone. Most people do. I haven't but I I don't take any opiates any more. I've had both shoulders replaced as well as my left hip replaced and these were total joint replacements. While I was recuperating, the surgeons gave me opiates for the pain but I had been taking Suboxone for quite a while previous to the surgeries. As soon as I could tolerate the pain ( hell, there ain't no such thing as a pain-free life, I don't care who you are!!) I got back on the Sub's none the worse for the experience. The choice is yours. It is easy for people who have never had their body scream and convulse for want of a fix to criticize you. Don't listen to 'em!
They have enough problems of their own whether they want to admit it or not. I know how you are feelin' and I wouldn't want anyone to experience that life where your day is eaten up trying to find some dope; anything to get rid of the blues. There's no worse feeling in the world that I can speak of. I took the time to write this, not as a plug for the drug (any way you can find that works is great!!) but as one addict(I hate that word) to another. Only addicts can help another addict. Sure, the doctors can get you through the withdrawal but it is ultimately your decision. Don't let anyone keep you from your quest for sanity. I know 'quest' is a strong word, but your desire to stay off the opiates is nothing less than a quest. You are on a mission to salvage your life, your relationships and ultimately, your self-respect and the best gift of all- peace of mind.
It is easy for me to sit here and tell you all this? Don't believe it. I have traveled a long and s***-filled road to arrive at this time in my life. Was it worth it? Sure as hell was and is. I say 'is' because each day is an adventure. Each day I can choose to be serene, play my music, love my friends, laugh, fish...you get my drift. Or. Or? Yeah, or I can go go get some dope (it'll take about a week before the naltrexone( the stuff in the Suboxone that blocks the opiate receptors) and feel high. Yeah you can take enough dope to override the naltrexone, but that's a s***-load of hard work. Who the f*** needs to work that hard? I damn sure don't! Let's face it; addiction, whatever your chosen poison, is a FULL TIME JOB!! I know you know that as well as anyone. I hope you quit THIS job and start taking it easy on yourself. I hope you can attain a little sanity and a boat-load of happiness!! However you decide to get off the train is good; there are a lot of stops on this train we have been riding, but they are hard to see because the conductor is a motherf***er! He wants you to ride on to the end of the line. He (might be a woman; I don't know) wants to take you to the final destination- I believe you are intelligent enough to figure out where the last stop is.
Go ahead and do SOMETHING; try Suboxone, meditation, 12-step group( which, by the way I attend on a regular basis; insert your definition or 'regular' here!) church, music(which I highly recommend for the maintenance of your soul)tiddlywinks, backgammon, cold turkey(I myself am too chickens*** to go that way) but do keep trying, my friend. Again, I don't know you but I know the disease; the son of a b**** that controls your every step and I would like to think that just by virtue of your writing for a little advice you'd like to see the dope as something you don't want or need in your life. I've taken time which is always well spent to write a few words which give you a small window into my experience. It is only that- my experience. There are as many ways to overcome this disease as there are faces in the world. I use the word 'disease', not in the commonly understood way, but for what it is. It is what we feel as (here comes that word again!) addicts. Dis-ease; uneasiness; a feeling of general, how shall I put this, s***itude. Yep, that says it for me. Well, you don't have to feel like this. Just do something. Anything. It makes no difference as long as you feel as if you are moving away from the monster and towards something that truly makes you happy. Something that gives you a kick in the pants( or skirt) every morning and tells you to reach a bit higher than yesterday; no matter how short your arms.
I hope you will achieve that feeling of satisfaction; the peace and self-respect. I GUARANTEE you will find it if you give yourself a break and get a little( I had to get a s***load, I tell ya!) professional help; emphasis on the word 'professional'. People want to help. Promise! I wouldn't have taken time to write you a few words if I didn't think so. Suboxone has worked for ME. I have friends made of far sterner stuff than I who have gone cold turkey, but not many. It is no disgrace to ask for help. Hell, make those professionals earn their keep. Alright, if this sounds like a sermon, it could well be. Make of it what you will. Only do ONE thing; just one thing: go to a doctor or someone for whom you have a lot a respect and ask them for a little direction. I can assure you they will be more than happy to do so. I was. I wish you a lot of luck and if there is( I think so, anyway) a God, I pray he, she or it will guide and protect you.
Best Wishes, Dorman (yeah, really!)
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Perfect description of addiction! I to am a recovering addict, I've used opiates for 20 years as well, mostly H & oxy's when you could shoot them. Also the Roxy's, blueberries or whatever you want to call them and I'm almost at 4 years of being narcotic free. I take Subutex twice a day. 8mg each. I have my life back, sanity, peace of mind have all returned. Don't listen to others and their bulls***. I did a 5 day stint in an inpatient rehab & 30 days in a sober living house. At the house we went to AA meetings everyday or even 2-3 times a day. Today I take my subs like my doctor has prescribed. I do have chronic pain from Cerebral Palsy and by taking the Subs I've stayed off dope and over the past 10 years Doctors have found that Suboxone & or Subutex (Suboxone without the blocker, Naloxone) have a pain killing affect to them as well as absolutely killing all my cravings or thoughts about getting high. I don't go to 12 step programs, they've never worked for me BUT I know they do and each person is different. I have a daily routine of doing things everyday that I follow to the tee. I'm not saying that you shouldn't attend 12 step meetings because they haven't worked for me and I have been in and out of those rooms for almost 15 years but they just never worked for me. I'm a "Your going to quit or your not" type of guy. Staying on the train your on has 3 stops, prison, insane asylum or death. I do practice some of the things a 12 step program tells you, consciously & subconsciously. I'll leave you with a few MUST DO's to stay on the right path to happiness and piece of mind. Get rid of everyone your hanging out with. I drooped people I've known for 30, YES 30 YEARS! Change cell number if you have one. Yes music is a necessity to sanity. Life was always about me, me, me. Help others. No matter what it is. Open a door for an elderly person walking in to an establishment, i.e. restaurant, store, movie theater. This is just some of my experience and what I do know to keep me on the right path. Suboxone has a cross on the back of the tablets for a reason, THEY'RE HEAVEN SENT!! Getting sober, whatever your method, is the gnarliest thing anyone in the world can ever do. Maybe, and I'll say it again, MAYBE 5-7 out of 100 people will be able to accomplish this. I've been to way to many funerals over the past 6 years, one should've been mine but I'm blessed that I haven't killed myself. That's what we, addicts, are doing to ourselves, slowly killing yourself. I've buried my brother, best friend of 25 years and a host of other people I know and love. Go to an inpatient rehab, take the cotton out of your ears and put it in your mouth. Do what they tell you. Get on Suboxone if your able to. Drop your "friends" and I use that term very lightly. The world doesn't revolve around me, you or anybody else so stop being so selfish and help others. It's the little things that matter most. I wish you and anyone else reading this, that you can maintain the sheer will power it'll take you to keep that big f***ing gorilla off your back. Be safe, and God Bless....
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My man, you need Suboxone. None of that will give you the feeling your brain is looking for. It will cause you to relapse in half a day. I been there. I'm a year and a half sober. The suboxone will give ur brain the thought that ur high, but ur not. This allows you to function normal. You might as well find a doctor in your area that prescribed suboxone. Otherwise, your only other option is rehab. Trust me. Take what works.
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Sally B. please get the help you need before you start worrying about coming off SUBOXONE. Relapsing and get back on the "sauce" for 8 months will give you terrible withdrawals from not having any opiates. I've been down that road to. The no sleep, cold sweets, racing thoughts, urge to use again, can all be fixed with a person willing to do WHAT EVER and I can't emphasize WHAT EVER enough, it takes to stay clean & sober. I might sound harsh but, I don't have any sympathy for people who are lucky enough to get on the Suboxone program and after a couple months sell their "SUBS" so they can buy dope. If you do what a good addiction specialist and prescriber of Suboxone tells you, you can kick the habit and stay clean. You have to want it. Just because an individual can obtain a Suboxone prescription doesn't mean all your problems are solved. It takes work. Hard work. The hardest you'll ever have to do in your/anyone's life to stay clean. Give it 100%, an honest 100% and you just might be surprised with the results. I wish you the best. Stay safe & God bless.
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Hi Brittany, I don't know if you have tried to wean off suboxone again, your post was from 6 months ago, but just in case you haven't, I have some info I can give that might help. The key to successfully tapering off suboxone is doing it very slowly. If you try to taper quickly you will go through withdrawal, which can be like opiate withdrawal, which we know is terrible. But a slow 6-8 month taper, which my suboxone doctor recommends, isn't that bad at all. You go down 1-2mg a month depending on the dose you're on. While tapering, it is important to drink lots of water, eat a healthy diet and get some exercise. This will help decrease withdrawal severity. On the addict and emotional side it's a good idea to attend some counseling and/or AA/NA meetings. This will help to keep you from relapsing. Whether you still needed this information or not, I hope things are going well for you. And remember that addiction doesn't have to control us, that we can control our addiction and have happy drug-free lives. God bless!
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I read everything you wrote, word for word. I am currently taking Percocet, 30 mg about 6 times a day along with oxy 30 mg 6 to 8 as well. This amount would put an elephant in a coma but not me. I have built up a very high tollerence since having surgery almost a year ago. I was diagnosed with CFS and fibromyalgia before I had the surgery but I wasn't aware that I also had Addison's disease. I am in severe and I mean severe chronic pain from head to toe all day long without my meds. I cannot function and I know that is part the addiction. I did stop cold turkey a few months ago to see if the pain was related to the meds. I had withdrawals for 2 days but for 3 weeks after I was in so much pain I could not walk or eat or sleep, even long after the meds were no longer in my body. So I started back up again and in 3 days I was my old self. I'm a mother of 5 so I can't afford the downtime. My dr just prescribed me nuvigil, just started it this morning but have not taken any other meds yet. I know your not a dr but I'm curious to know that when you started the alternative meds, i forgot what it was called, did it help with your pain? Were you still able to function? And info would be greatly appreciated. I just want to be normal again and I know it's impossible with the diseases I have but it would be nice to have some hope and alternative lifestyle to look forward to. Thank you
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I'm 2 years sober after 8 roxy 30s per day. I have done it all as far as withdrawing and no one can do it without assistance. You need to get into and outpatient program where Suboxon is prescribed. This will help tremendously. It takes withdrawals away but the first 3 days isn't anything special. You are just somber then back to yourself in 4-5 days. Suboxon helps with pain. In my program there are people in your situation and now take Suboxon for pain. If that doesn't help, I help orthopedic surgeons' in total joint replacement and I can get you a prescribed pain cream. That will help your pain to allow you to focus on your addiction. I don't know where you're from but I can refer you to a few great outpatient facilities in CT. Not only do it for yourself but do it to be a mentor and hero in your children's eyes. Whether you know it or not, They know exactly what your doing. I'm sure your nodding off and thinking you look normal. I don't even know what u look like and I can tell you, you probably don't look yourself. I took Nuvigil and if your not narcoleptic then stop. It's the drugs that make you tired. And the Nuivigil counteracts with an opiate so u probably notice yourself needing more opiates. Throw the Nuvigil away because it's doing nothing. Plus after 250mg it's doesn't work. It depresses the seratonin in your brain and you become almost BiPolar. I'm here to help.
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I'm am 1 year and 6 months clean off a bad opiate addiction. I felt like there was no way to be clean then I found suboxone and now I'm ok. This drug will help you if you truly ready to get clean.
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Thank you JMars4 for the reply. I appreciate any info you can relay to me. I'm in California but I'm really interested in the cream you mentioned. If it works as good as you say it does then I would be able to ween myself off the meds and hopefully just use the ointment. Honestly idk what to do. My dr has me on cortef for my lack of cortisol, nuvigil for my daytime insomnia and lack of energy, lots of vitamins, Iv vitamin infusions daily, 5 doses of adrenal support 2 times a day which is a med made by my pain mgmt dr who is also a pharmacist, 10,000 ui vitamin D because I'm extremely deficient, lots of magnesium I take on my own to help with the constipation, zinc, vitamin a and c, a probiotic also made by my dr which costs $100 for a months supply, floravital which is liquid iron and herbs for my anemia, fiorcet for my migraines, gave me Xanax for my anxiety and depression but I hated the feeling so I stopped taking it,c-liothyronine (t3) for my low thyroid who's is a compound med $120 a month, DHEA ALSO MADE BY MY DR AT $80 a bottle which lasts 2 months, amrix which I take 2 (15 mh) at 5:00 pm which makes me sleepy 4-5 hours later, somnapure a herbal natural sleep aid 2 pills 46 minutes before bed time which is also $60 a bottle for 1 months supply and Valium 5 mg that I take right before bed to help me sleep. I am extremely depressed because of my illness and also lots of personal issues I'm having with my husband, so my dr prescribed prozac to me yesterday. He said that I am 1 catastrophe or big stressor or 1 infection like bronchitis or phemonia or a cold, away from my death. His exact words, no joke. Addisons is a disease that flares up when u are under stress As much as I try to avoid it, my middle name is stress. Min the past 2 years, my daughter had a baby at 18, married the biggest son of a b**** in the world, had a horrible divorce, been fighting in court for full custody but our only judge in this stupid small town has no business working anymore. Barney rubble is his best frien, if u know what I mean. My oldest son has been battling depression since he was 6 and was hospitalized at Stanford med for suicide watch. He since has improved tremendously. My 16yr old has had knee surgery on both, shower surgery and goes in every 3 months for what they call rooster juice for his knees. My daughter had another baby and wants to get married again. My 9 yr old is so addicted to games that he moves his hands around in his sleep as though he's playing. And I have a very active and amazing 3 yr old. On top of all that i found out my husband has been cheating on me. Not once but twice, three times, four times and so on. All these add to my Addisons. I'm depressed, I'm scared, im always in pain and the one and only thing that gives me relief is oxy. I have weened myself completely off of percocet so that is one great accomplishment. I would like to hear more about your experience with suboxone when you have the time. Thank you so much. Jess
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When I read your post I felt the pain and suffering I have known all too well. It was like reading about my own experience. It's been about a month since you posted on here and I was just checking to see how you are doing. I was very concerned for your well being and I just wanted to make sure that you are okay : ) I wish you the best in recovery.
I take both Nuvigil and Xanax and I must say Nuvigil is MAGIC. I've been suffering from bipolardepression and fortunately have been able to finally find the right med cocktail to keep me stable and out of the dark. Unfortunately the drugs I'm taking have some side effects. EMSAM gives me insomnia and Abilify makes me drowsy. With EMSAM I wake up in the middle of the night and take 0.25mg Xanax which puts me back to sleep. For the drowsiness on Abilify and also for it's antidepressant qualities my doc prescribed me Nuvigil.
Oh how I love my Nuvigil! I take one 250 mg in the morning and I crank the most boring work in a blink of an eye, I don't need coffee, I feel so happy and energized. In the beginning Nuvigil was giving me coke-like euphoria, but then my body adjusted to it and I just feel happy and full of energy. My doc says it's not addictive. Duh.
I would have never tried to stop taking my Nuvigil as I've been taking it for 6 months and didn't develop any tolerance/increase need. BUT this drug gives me quite noticeable hair loss! It started at exact time I started Nuvigil and I did ton of blood work and there were no any deficiencies nor thyroid issue. Unfortunately FDA and drug insert do not mention the hair loss, but with a quick Internet search I discovered thousands of people who are having the same hair loss issue on Nuvigil.
So I stopped Nuvigil one week ago.... What can I say.. "Non- addictive"?! I can't function! All I wanna do is sleep all day. I drink 7-9 cups of coffee a day to stay awake. The Abilify drowsiness maybe affecting me too, but never like that before I was on Nuvigil. I want my Nuvigil so bad :( but my vanity takes it's place being a woman - I don't wanna be bold!
But not everyone has this weird hair loss side effect on Nuvigil so it may work for you.
To cope with Oxy addiction Nuvigil may be actually amazing. Yes you may get addicted to Nuvigil but the down is so mild competitive to what you might be going through. It's not like I'm in pain, depressed, anxious or crowning on the floor without Nuvigil, I'm just really really tired and need immense amounts of coffee. I hope it will pass soon.
Did anyone experienced getting off Nuvigil? How long will the fatigue last? It's been a week for me now. Still very tired. P.S. I went cold turkey.
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Did u ever get better? And subutex should help with the issues u have. It's for opiate based users. Gets u off the other drugs.
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Better Choices Says:
This goes out to anyone who desperately wants to detox off of opiates, but finds the battle to be a losing one. I would never advise going cold turkey unless your plight with opiates was short lived. I have kicked opiates many times over in the last forty years, and have found only one solution that works with gentle ease as it takes you back to reality, and without the horrors that accompany uppers, downers, or going it cold turkey. The solution is Methadone detox. It will take you down gently in 21 days n deliver you to a drug free life. If your addiction is of stronger proportions and you think you'll return to the devils hold, you may want to get on Methadone maintenance. I have been on the maintenance program for 14 years, and never once fell back into using. I must add... You have to really want this freedom, and fill your life with better life choices.