Citalopram Has Ruined My Marriage
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Andrew Says:


A while a ago my daughter was being bullied at school, which drove her to take an overdose, thank fully she was ok and is doing fine now. But my wife took it really hard and started to suffer with anxiety so the doctor gave her citalopram. Instantly I noticed a change in her attitude, she just turned so hard faced and cold toward me, then what was a healthy sexual relationship turned to a relationship with no sex at all, I've tried to tell her that this drug has changed her but she is not interested, this drug had changed her from being a normal loving mother/wife to a woman who needs no love or affection. And now after 15yrs of being together she wants a divorce, to sell the house and go our separate ways, I am absolutely devastated I can't imagine my life without this woman I have loved for so long, but it's the medication im dealing with not my wife, she's in there some where but I can't and don't know how to bring her back. I love my wife and would do anything to keep her and not get divorced but it all seems to be falling on deaf ears. Is there anyone out there who knows what I can do? I am heartbroken and don't want to leave her in this state but she is adamant that we split immediately.



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74
Chris Says:

I have been with my husband for 17 years, married 18 months. My father-in-law passed away suddenly and I encouraged my to see a doctor and he was put on Citalopram. 2 years he has been on them and we have our arguments, like all couples but he has now said he doesn't love me and showing no emotion al all! Having read this forum, it has made me realise that the arguments we have had have been increased since he has been on this medication.

I am distraught, I love my husband more then anything, he is my sole mate! I don't know what to do. Its 5 weeks till xmas and he wants to separate! Our 13 year old daughter is so upset, but this isn't making a difference. Sex has been none existent since being on these tablets and I have not pressured him. This drug needs to be revaluated as it is messing with peoples families. I am sure there are other medication that can help.



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73
ICE Says:

citalopram is about to destroy 13 years of happy marriage

Morning this is the first time that i have ever used a blog like this to understand the situation that i am in.... i am a male, Husband with 2 amazing children and what use to be a very loving and caring wife. (I will explain)

My wife was this amazing loving and caring person i have ever meet and we were so happy. After the birth of our second child see started getting panic attacks, unable to leave the house, crying and hot flushes.... i tried to be supportive to her but with very little understanding on mental health its difficult.

She went to a her Doctor and she was given 20 MG of Citalopram i don't like the idea of antidepressants but i was willing to let her short term to cope with what ever was going on with her..

This worked really well sex was amazing, she was intermit with me and we could not keep our hands off each other. then she started to feel sick and the attacks happened again so the doctor increased the dose to 30 Mg (This is when it started to go wrong even thou at the time i did not know this) 4 months later she can't stand the sight of me, does not want to engage in cuddles kisses or any sign of affection.

All our friends called us the happiest couple that they have ever known and love the fact that we always did fun and exciting things together.

I asked her when she started feeling like this and it was around the time that her does was increased, she is completely emotionless when it comes to me.
I know that some people will think that i may have to face the fact that she does not love me any more, but there is no way we go from being the happiest couple to out of love to the point she really does not care about me in 4 months (At the same time the dose was increased)

Family members have said that see looks like she is in a gaze like she is there but know one at home.

She wants to leave me now and have said that see loves me but don't want to touch me or any thing... the problem is is that she can't see that its the drug that is numbing her and in like so many stories i have read it will be to late..

This drug is horrible she was meant to be on it for 6 months and its now nearly 3 years doctors need to take control of this...

13 years of a relationship is to fall victim to this horrible drug

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72
ICE Says:

Morning this is the first time that i have ever used a blog like this to understand the situation that i am in.... i am a male, Husband with 2 amazing children and what use to be a very loving and caring wife. (I will explain)

My wife was this amazing loving and caring person i have ever meet and we were so happy. After the birth of our second child see started getting panic attacks, unable to leave the house, crying and hot flushes.... i tried to be supportive to her but with very little understanding on mental health its difficult.

She went to a her Doctor and she was given 20 MG of Citalopram i don't like the idea of antidepressants but i was willing to let her short term to cope with what ever was going on with her..

This worked really well sex was amazing, she was intermit with me and we could not keep our hands off each other. then she started to feel sick and the attacks happened again so the doctor increased the dose to 30 Mg (This is when it started to go wrong even thou at the time i did not know this) 4 months later she can't stand the sight of me, does not want to engage in cuddles kisses or any sign of affection.

All our friends called us the happiest couple that they have ever known and love the fact that we always did fun and exciting things together.

I asked her when she started feeling like this and it was around the time that her does was increased, she is completely emotionless when it comes to me.
I know that some people will think that i may have to face the fact that she does not love me any more, but there is no way we go from being the happiest couple to out of love to the point she really does not care about me in 4 months (At the same time the dose was increased)

Family members have said that see looks like she is in a gaze like she is there but know one at home.

She wants to leave me now and have said that see loves me but don't want to touch me or any thing... the problem is is that she can't see that its the drug that is numbing her and in like so many stories i have read it will be to late..

This drug is horrible she was meant to be on it for 6 months and its now nearly 3 years doctors need to take control of this...

13 years of a relationship is to fall victim to this horrible drug

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71
Mari Says:
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Well usually people are told they can go on it for a period of time and come off. Be very careful to taper off by reducing dosage over time. You need to know as does she this drug can alter brain architecture. Specifically by neurogenics. You may have been happy with how things were going but maybe she wasn't and didn't know exactly what was wrong or possibly how to express it. If you want to support her suggest she come off the drug with Dr.s help and then examine your life together and make plans on how to improve it. Maybe go to marriage counseling to help each of you to express wants and needs in a constructive manner to each other. Understand for many these drugs can be addictive. The drug companies would like nothing better. People grow and change and needs become different during ones life time. Clearly she was becoming anxious over something so as her life partner you must make an effort to understand and help her. It may not, probably won't be easy. But what is the alternative?

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70
Cm Says:
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She went on it after our second child just for anxiety, been on them around 8 months now, i dont think she believes its the drug but im nearly getting her to possibly believe it. I dont think she needs this drug for anxiety and theres no way she could just become the way she is weve been together since we were kids. She wants space to clear her mind which i have given her i dont know if thats a good idea or bad idea.

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69
Mari Says:
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Does she recognize the change in her? If not then I would suggest you bring your best, kindest conversational skills and explain in detail the changes you see in her. Be specific. I believe this drug can change personality and alter the mind. You don't give much information as to time on drug, reasons she was put on it etc. I also ask, did she or you or both ever explore why and what life events brought on the symptoms she is seeking relief from a pill? And were other steps taken to try and improve her life/situation before starting meds? Finally, she may be having an adverse reaction as you stated you are concerned. She might no realize adverse effects may be happening to her including her thought process and emotional blunting.

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68
C mercer Says:
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Hi, im feeling the same thing is about to happen to me, my wife has changed so much im worried to death. Is there any advice out there.

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67
Me Says:
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I am on the other side and can relate fully. I stopped caring about anything. I'm

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66
g Says:

My girlfriend of two years started taking citalopram and it seemed like she experienced some significant personality changes around that time. She became impatient, irritable and started expressing hostility towards me regularly. She wasn't goofy or playful like she used to be and seemed like she was always upset at me. It was causing me a lot of stress because I felt like she was always angry at me, and anything I tried to say would make it worse. Finally, I decided I would not walk on eggshells but would rather be honest about my needs and boundaries, and this led to her losing it and hanging up the phone on me after which I decided to break it off and go no contact. For me there was a noticeable change from someone who was goofy, silly, playful and able to be an adult when it mattered, to someone who was impatient, easily irritated, angry, and apathetic, maybe anhedonic. I never said anything about the fact that I thought it may have been the antidepressant because I was afraid she would have accused me of being judgmental for whatever I said. The change was sudden and drastic, and as much as I loved her and wanted to be with her and possibly raise a family, it was not worth putting up with abuse. After this experience, I will not date anyone using this medication or any similar because of the stability issues. I myself have worked through trauma, and took citalopram for a time for depression, but not for long and only half the recommended dosage. It was much more beneficial for me to explore and release the emotions organically with support of others. I think most people opt for medicating because they aren't willing or able to dedicate the time and energy to organic healing. I was fortunate in my case. I wish her the best but I can't be close to her anymore.

I found this by googling "citalopram and breakups" because I was suspicious the cit played a role and found this thread. I identify with so much and would be interested to read Dr. Breggin's book.

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65
Joanna Says:
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My husband has been taking citalopram for anxiety issues for three years now. He has no empathy anymore. He directs his anger to people and stuff outside our domestic sphere. But he does not really listen to me anymore. He makes light of me and my feelings. I feel like I am banging my head against a granite wall. Sex is different now too, but that is the least of it really. He just seems to be hard and lacking in empathy. And it really hurts because I totally love him.

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64
Mari Says:
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So very sorry to read of your situation. Please get Peter R Breggin MD book Medication Madness. You read it then give to your husband to read. This is a common problem with this medication.
Good luck. Mari

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63
Vito Says:
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After a few months on Escitalopram my husband changed so much I cant recognise him.We separated.I informed his doctor, GP about changes and mentioned that the family should be informed when this medication is prescribed and that psychiatric help should be considered. She was surprised about severity of side effects but did not promise anything, no potential evaluation, no consultation with my husband, possibility of other drugs, options... such a grey area, as spouses want to help but GPs have to remain confidential... feeling hopeless and disapointed..this medication changed our world and the family is devastated..

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62
Samantha Says:
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Can anything be done to reserve this medication? I'm still very much in love with my husband and want him back. Our son is very distraught over this as well he doesn't understand why his daddy doesn't want to be at home I'm very desperate.....

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61
Mari Says:
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I've just read through Peter R. Breggin, MD where he clearly describes how Celexa destroys marriages. He throughly states the stages and how this happens but the people don't realize it's the drug. Highly recommend his book medication madness. He is a Harvard trained Dr. In practice for 4 decades.

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60
Samantha Says:
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Hi my name is Samantha my husband and I have known each other basically all our lives been in other relationships but found one another 14yrs ago been married 8 yrs now and have a beautiful 7 yr old son together, he has suffered from depression and anxiety for a very long time. He was off all medicine for almost 6 yrs he recently starting seeing this doctor she prescribed him this citalopram and Xanax he took it for 2weeks then out of the blue said he loves me but isn't in love with me? Now he is living on the streets basically. Our 7 yr old son and I are both confused in need of answers can any one help?

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Beth Says:
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My husband of 2 1/2 years (we dated for 8 years before getting married) started taking Citalopram after bringing up his anxiety/depression to the doctor during a routine physical. The doctor kept pushing him to give it a try and after declining it 3 times during the appointment, he finally gave in and decided to give it a shot. Our marriage was going great and we were happier than ever with a beautiful 16 month old daughter, until one day a few weeks after starting the Citalopram.. out of the blue my husband told me our marriage wasn't going to work. He said he wasn't happy and hasn't been for a long time and he didn't love me like he used to. Everyone that knows him can't even believe it and are in complete shock because he was just so happy with his family weeks before. He had been saying we should try for baby #2 within the next month or so. Also, he just bought me a necklace for mothers day that had 3 charms- one with our daughter's name, birth date & birth stone, one with mine, and one with HIS! He gave me a family necklace including himself one day, and weeks later he wants to end things! I told him I was worried it was the medication and he said if anything it's been helping him think more clearly.. but I don't believe it. He is not the loving guy I've known for over 10 years! He doesn't even want to try to fight for our marriage. Just decided it was over. He is thinking, talking, and acting irrationally and I blame this drug! This all started shortly after starting Citalopram. (He started Chantix as well as Citalopram for the first 2 weeks, but dropped the Chantix after 2 weeks because he didn't think it was working to quit smoking).

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Randy Says:
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My fiancee of six months recently started lexapro 10 mg daily for depression and severe mood swings. I knew that it would squelch her interest in sex but I never thought it could change her into the ghost of the woman I fell in love with. Her passion is gone. That spark is nonexistent now. She confessed after her first week on the drug that she didn't feel anything anymore when I kissed her. I've remained unchanging though. We had committed the rest of our lives together then out of nowhere she says "if things don't work out and we go our separate ways, just remember I'll always have love for you...." Each day my heart breaks when I look the shell of the woman I fell in love with. Her eyes are distant and disinterested. Her lips are numb. Her touch is detached. And talking to her about it is like talking to an alcoholic while he's under the influence. Its pointless and useless. Her family and friends of course haven't noticed what to me is a complete 180 degrees change. Because I've been with her 24/7 for six months. She loves me but she's not IN love with me anymore. And this is only week three into the medication. I'm scared and uncertain about our future together, the plans we made. And don't tell me its just me or maybe it's the relationship itself. She changed after day three on the drug. I've lost the love of my life to the antidepressant's zombie grip....

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57
Vito Says:
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Hello, So sorry to hear. Experienced the same with my husband and his medication. We can only try to find the person we love behind this foggy behaviour of theirs and I wish you all luck and patience.....Vito

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Mari Says:
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To all who read this research cytokines and dysfunction of the immune system. Deregulation of brain structures can cause depression. It's likely biological and few dr.s in mental health accept this. It took 50 years to discover peptic ulcers were caused by bacteria not emotional stress. Childhood fear and trauma can cause alteration in brain STRUCTURE as can hidden viruses and bacteria. There is a link. SSRI's flood all parts of the brain even the ones that don't need it. Talk theraphy to deal with changes you need to make in your life and a nutricianist as well as cortisol test to seeif immune system is over active would be a good place to start.

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Mari Says:
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Steve,
What is an AAP? I'm unfamiliar with that acronym. On the Ted Talk series's there is a woman who was dignosis a physcoprentic and after years of treatment was able to identify and deal with the trauma that brought on the symptoms. I think these symptoms are brought on as a protective mechanism and to tell us something is wrong. I also thing in some cases it could be a brain stucture difference and since the young brain has plasticity it can be altered. Truth is medical profession wants to give a pill and forget about it but in many cases it too years for these thing to built and to think flooding the brain with seratonin is the answer is wishful thinking if they really thought about it using critical thought and look at the true outcomes as to efficacy. It's the only thing they have and big pharma is not likely to give up the billions even if it means lives.

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