Over Taking My Suboxone

Updated

I am a 30 yo female and I've been in suboxone treatment for about two years. I have stayed at two mg strips twice a day for most of that time.. a few months ago I started overtaking my suboxone, usually with a half a strip up to a whole extra a day..for whatever reason it seems to help my anxiety although I know it's all mental it's just things have gotten so stressful lately. I had been seeing one doctor and after a few failed attempts to make an appointment and him closing early or not being there I started seeing another doctor. The last two times I've been to the doctor I've alternated between the two.. I tried to fill my prescription today and the pharmacy said that it showed I was seeing multiple provider's.. when I called to speak with the doctor they knew what I have been doing.. I am tried of living this way having to lie and scheme and hide..this is not sobriety suboxone has helped me so much. I've been sober now for two years and don't think much about my drug of choice which was pills. Now I'm afraid that my doctor will refuse to see me and not help me wean off. I would like to either go down on my dose or stop but I know cold turkey is just asking for a relapse. I'm a single mom with two kids that need me to be able to function, I also work full time so it's really not an option. I know at this point honesty is the only option and hope for help..does anyone have any advice or been in this situation..thank you for your time!

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