Invega (my Story)

Well when I was first introduced into invega I had just finished a season of work in a different province and I had moved into an apartment with a roommate who I thought was a friend. Literally as soon I entered that apartment I started hearing voices. (i will say this though. I was claiming unemployment from a relatives address) anyways I move in this apartment and I hear myself being called a confident prick and that there has been a breech. Ironically my roommate was an initiate free mason and as the story goes.. I one day noticed my wallet was missing. I distinctively remember putting it on a stand in the living room and then later falling asleep. (also I was sleeping on an air mattress and not on the lease hehe.) so I wake up and notice my wallet is gone. My apparent roommate whom I had plans with decided the plans were cancelled and that he had other plans and I ask about my wallet and he suggests maybe the rats took it. So I'm alone in the apartment now battling these voices... Coping the best I can. Someone outside had yelled that I should go to the hospital like an adult. Well I heard many things really. I was paranoid.. never heard these things before and now my financial earnings were inaccessible and I was in a new place. Eventually I went out into the halls of the apartment. And started knocking on doors.. I was certain the woman below me had a gun and suffered with dementia. There were other voices saying she had lived there a long time and took a lot of money from people. I imagined how I could turn her in. Now at some point I gave up mind games and started talking and persuading her with love and that I'd walk her down the isle on her wedding day to the police. (sounds messed up right) well eventually I spoke a song and I finished with a very loud scream. It was some sort of sincere expression and very emotional.

Eventually the police came... I invited them in. Asked them if they wanted tea. They didn't cuff me and I walked to their vehicle. I was leaving that hell hole. (When I first started hearing these voices I was battling back silently saying I'd find and kill them. Anyways the police escorted me to the hospital. Voices have stopped while I was checking in. I told them people were watching my activity on the computer and that my wallet was stolen. They tried to give me drugs but I refused.. I went into an isolation room..started talking in my head with the voices now friendly and started learning about myself. I was going through a personal awakening. And even at that it takes years to awaken deeper and deeper if you are not vigilant. Anyways I'm in the hospital some stuff happened..I won't explain everything because there was a lot that happened that I remember. I eventually slept. Woke up and was released from my room... I tried to escape the hospital and was restrained by a lot of people I didn't want to hurt them so I just eventually let them all lay on me and drag me back in. They even tried to drug me with a tranquilizer and I snatched it from one of them and threw it away because they strapped my feet in before my hands lol. Anyways they drugged me.. I fought it...it won..I fell asleep... While I was sleeping a doctor questioned me while I was unconscious and when I woke up there was a guy there that let me out and gave me some food and what not. I happened to walk over to the office and my name was on a paper. it was the paper that the doctor filled out while I was unconscious. This doctor was saying things about aliens and satellites and nothing to do with what I was just experiencing. Anyways a lot of s*** happened. When I first took invega I lied about hearing voices and took the initial shot of 150mg followed by another 150mg.

I stopped taking the medication immediately after being released. Some time went by I heard voices saying I had a lot of money and that I'm gonna give it all away. Naturally I was like F*** you. And then I hear a door knock.. a red cross worker was asking for donations so guess who signed up. Hah yeah I started listening and fighting with these voices and some crazy stuff has happened but the mostly interesting of all things is how the government does not condone spiritual awakening like other countries do so. I actually had one incident where I was awake for 7 days and seen a star of light fly through a window and enter my chest. I had hallucinations of Apple having a survey with me via some kind of artificial intelligence. Hell I seen a star of light transform into an alien and then a Fox. I punched a mirror and it didn't break and splashed water back at me. I wrote poetry and expressed many things on paper.. designs used symbolic numbers and letters and the maybe just all crazy at this point.. I was hearing voices of loved ones. My bosses and other assorts. It was a lot to process. I can see how I would of been dangerous because I wanted to destroy the government for condoning disease and being apart of secret society and free myself from the grips of stupid people. Well I eventually re entered the hospital about 9 months after my initial visit from kicking a girl out of my house and I shoved her because she was taking too long to leave and cops came and detained me. (yes seriously. I managed to go through all this wacky stuff and I got put in handcuffs for that.) I opened the door and they grabbed me and drove me to the hospital. Wouldn't tell me their names or anything. I resisted them inside the hospital and slightly caved in a wall with my foot because they weren't given permission to take me. They drugged me, I fell asleep and woke up. The doctor was there saying I'd go through the 30 days of nonsense. I flipped the table and knocked over chairs. I was tackled...drugged again. I woke up. Went to the office, seen a nurse reading my personal journal! I grabbed it and took some other papers that were mine and in the midst of that I also had a paper from another doctor who talked to me while I was drugged. He said that I was having tactile hallucinations and that I threw a girl! So I took invega for 7 months. 100mg one weekly dose 5 100mg monthly doses and 2 75mg doses..

I lost control of my guitar fingers.. can't dance properly, got the shakes.. gained weight. Appetite and metabolism is out of whack. I stopped 4 months ago. I heard voices on and off throughout the whole experience. I tend to hear things in static noise especially like a fan in specific. Recently my mother's cat passed away and I had a voice saying something terrible was going to happen. I'm getting better. I don't think invega helped me other than calm me down a bit from some of the overwhelming sleep deprivation and constant thinking. The voices did help as well and I periodically still hear them. I just didn't comprehend the idea or like the voices happening and dealing with the hospital so it is very hard to go through this sort of thing. I lost about 35k and didn't work for a year.. I lived off my bank account and support of family and others. I had pretty much no family but his encounter brought my family closer together and I got over a couple phobias.. I was xenophobic for about 2 years of my life. I get dreams mostly that depict parts of my day life and voices that talk to me and break me down where I need be and boost me as needed. Learning new words from them and they help me solve issues with my gf. I've come a long way really.. the meds are not completely out of my body yet and I've lost about 12 of the 20 lbs I gained. My shakes stopped... I'm learning better emotions and skills and lessons. Last night I went to bed and heard voices and sounds and turned it into music and hallucinated visually before falling to sleep. I'm no longer out to destroy the government... Don't hate people... Ect ect. Anyways learn from my story and take what you want from it. invega is terrible and only good if you are not ready for reality. It alters reality in a way that you will not learn of yourself but it will help your family see you calmer... I'll never go on this crap again lol. I just know way better of myself. Keep a journal, exercise, eat well, listen, talk, have relationships. And certainly get your emotions and energy in check. you'll not need the doctors advice unless you are actually convinced that you are going to harm others. I knew to not hurt anyone... Was just a crazy ride and there would be more to come that's for sure. Oh also I noticed I was emotionless... Sleeping too much, couldn't exercise cause I was too weak. All that stuff does is block receptors in the brain and antagonize the brain chemistry. I'd rather learn and grow through experience.. Anyways good luck out there.

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