How Long Will It Last?

Updated

It's been 1 week, and 4 days since I last drank a dose. I feel more over whelmed than anything at this point. I'm going crazy in my own head doing anything to drowned out the thoughts constantly watching movies, listening to music, and complicating the positives and negatives well continuing school. It's been almost 6 years since I started taking opiates my body is decayed, malnourished and run down. What I thought was a short term program after trying to quit opiates several times at detox on my 17th birthday I joined the methadone clinic in desperate need. At this time in my life I can truly say I didn't want to get better I was diagnosed with PTSD, and social anxiety. my daily doses was 95 mg plus I still had been abusing OxyContin when available it took me a year and a half to actually quit using pills. Not once did the doctors threaten to kick me off or offer any treatment each time I pee'd dirty they would higher my dose within 6 months I was sitting at 115 mg daily weighing 120 pounds 6 foot I had very little appetite living off sweets and pop.
I can remember waking up around 730 am. I would always have a bucket in front of the couch due to nausea, and vomiting. I would sleep hours upon hours in late 2010, early 2011 I had maxed out my dose at 120mg daily. I quickly realized I was really dependent on this. Since I am so small and malnourished I was able to decrease to 25mgs without any agony. I started school and was comfortable the doctors told me "maybe I will be on this for the rest of my life" and to embrace it look at it as a blood pressure medication it keeps you stable. I trusted the doctors I had been prescribed many different medications for depression and etc. I wasn't depressed I was miserable with my life, and ashamed. I had burnt all bridges with life long friends. Relationships that once meant a lot to me were gone I was alone but I was satisfied with being high. I met my dad on my 16th birthday. My dad just so happened to be prescribed the same medication and from him I learnt the trait of being an oxymoron. I started using with my father but in 2010 on thanks giving i had to cut ties with him as he got deeper and deeper in the cycle of addiction he moved up and I realized I was f***ed for allowing myself to be in that environment. Now 2013 at 8mgs, 21 years old I jumped the dose and told the doctors to beat it on june 28th 2013. It was a blessing in disguise although I feel miserable I can think for myself and feel free. Although my mood changes moment to moment I am far from irritated as I was on methadone. I feel like I was on a power trip 24/7 always constantly disrespecting my grandma. And I'm a selfish prick for being that way being off anti depressants, opiates. Is a life changer I hope to continue the education I never had a chance to achieve due to opiate use. Meet someone who likes me for me and accepts the things I've done. No ones perfect in this day an age, I know I still have a long journey ahead and focusing on me is key. Growing up being in rehab's and detox's older men alway's told me " you have to want to change for yourself " and I never got it. But this time around its for me, not for some girl I met and spilt my guts out so I feel like I can change for her, not for my mother so I can move back in. It's for myself and I stress that anyone who thinks about getting clean has to do it for themselves. I've tried to change for many it never worked I was either using in my spare time or sneaking around to get high. It's now 11:35 PM July 9th I'm estimating about 4-8 weeks of withdrawals due to the long half life if I'm lucky. I'm mainly worried only because I haven't really experienced any withdrawal symptoms besides RSL, and Aniexty, panic attacks, loose bowels and I feel as if its going to kick me in the ass during week 2-3. Anyone else have this experience?

I'm also very unhealthy sitting at 130 pounds 6'1 I'm a complete mess

2 Replies

Earliest Newest Votes
1

HI! Wow, you've certainly been through a lot and deserve a lot of credit for realizing that you needed to change things.

Methadone is very hard to kick, that's why most people that have used it to treat addiction end up on a lifetime maintenance dose of it.

Learn more Methadone details here.

Some have said that the cravings for it never stop.

How are you doing now? Please post back and let everyone know. :-)

Was this helpful? 0
2

Is it actually possible to taper hydrocodone doses and effectively reduce the severity of withdrawal pain when you finally taper to zero ? I have recently been @ 120mg per day and even had occasional days when I took 200 mg. I tried to stop all at once this past weekend, just taking some clonidine, advil, etc. I lasted 24 hours - no matter how much clonidine and melatonin I took, I couldn't sleep. I have been thru some very rough detoxes with alcohol and a couple with opiates/subutex. this has been the worst opiate withdrawal pain I have ever felt - maybe jumping from 120mg per day was too drastic for my system to handle. i'm not expecting a pain free withdrawal - but this was too much. so if I am tapering and feeling moderate discomfort when I drop my dose, are my receptors actually doing some healing even though there is some level of opiate present ?

Was this helpful? 0

More Discussions:

how long will the anxity last after not takeing norcos

I've been clean off norcos for six day after taking five a day for five years how long will the anxity that I now ha...

1 REPLY
How long will a fever last if it is caused by a blanket?

If there was a fever caused by overheating or blanket, how long will it last? A day? Hour? ## Hello, Christina! How are ...

1 REPLY
How long will my withdrawal symptoms from Cymgen last?

I was taking Cymgen 60mg for about 7 months, and I recently changed to Brintellix. To ween myself off of Cymgen, I took ...

1 REPLY
Augmentin - How long will it work after the last dose?

How long after taking Augmentin is it in your system for? I'm taking it for a breast infection... ## It may linger f...

1 REPLY
How Long Will Suboxone Last per dose?

I took about 1/3 of a 8mg suboxone at around 9 this morning and it is around 4pm now and i am still feeling dizzy and na...

10 REPLIES
How long will pencillin last in fridge

If pencillin tablets are kept in fridge and have the gel pac in the bottle, how long will they be good for. My mom has s...

2 REPLIES
How long will my period last after stopping Quasense?

I've been on Quasense for about 6-7 weeks. I know they say to stick it out for 2-3 months. But between the constant ...

1 REPLY
how long will side effects last after 4 days

I have been taking Chantix for 4 days in a row and I feel horrible!!! how soon will this be out of my system?? ## Hello,...

2 REPLIES
How long will side effects last?

I have been on losartan 25mg for 3 weeks. BP well controlled at 125/70. Getting dizziness and weakness in legs. Are thes...

1 REPLY
How long will my memory loss last for?

I am 17 years and took Dormonoct for 4 months to help me sleep and then stopped. I am experiencing short-term memory los...

2 REPLIES